A long time ago, when I started part-time work in computer support at our local Help Desk, I read the introductory training material. One point that stuck out for its perspicacity was how to handle difficult customers. The observation was that if the customer is going off on a voluble tirade, ask questions with very short yes/no answers to limit the flow of words. On the other hand, ask open-ended questions of reticent customers to draw them out into a conversation.
Last week I asked another manager how to manage a difficult employee, and I just realized that his answer fits the same model. The problem is (a serious lack of) time management, and the solution is to set requirements for progress with expectations for milestones. It's closer to micro-management than I like, but I know how to set self-management as an expectation now too.
Manage the difficult by presenting the opposite. I get it now.
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